ever moving forward...

requiring frequent + stimulation is quite a tedious task. it has to be done responsibly. - stimulation leads to too much collateral damage. how is + stimulation maintained in an environment that is not exactly + energetically? my new motto is becoming "i am in trouble." i suppose that's not the most + outlook though. my variable attention span can be quite problematic within this context. the damage done up until the discovery of this state of my finite being has been relatively significant.

damage reveals itself in various forms from current/past behaviors/actions. more recently i've been eating too much outside prepared food. this is an expensive activity. i am definitely not in a position to make a habit of it. i have to start cooking for self again. the family meals have been problematic lately. i actually enjoy cooking, but the kitchen issues w/my current environment obscure much of the pleasure of the experience. pulling dirty dishes out of their storage areas tends to remove the enthusiasm of the preparation process.

i'm hungry as i write this, but the food that i've eaten from family meals has not been tasty. sometimes the food is over/under done, or it just does not look/taste appealing. it's rather discouraging, but eating out is not a viable solution...

i have much to do. moving forward w/o inflicting further damage is key. what  a challenge. i have to keep telling self that it can be done. if i do not, "i am in trouble..."

make like all is under control in the finite realm...

PEACE
...be calm...