so be dat...

sometimes i wonder who the fuck i am. at this age you would think i'd know that answer w/o question. perhaps this explains some of my persistent difficulty w/getting my shit to go where i'd like it to be in life...

i know 1 thing w/o question. i have a certain resilience/persistence that has kept me from being completely devoured by my questionable psychological states. it seems to be quite a bit easier to move around when there are people who support your endeavors, but fuck it, i have to work w/what i have available.

can't just fold up & quit.

i find it disturbing sometimes that i do not have more of an influence on the godren's everyday doings. i feel like the wife teaches them things that will cause them problems as humans in this society. it can be difficult. she'll say she understands, but she keeps doing the same shit. the godren pick up on it as functional behavior. i've gotten to the point now where i'm often like "fuck it." i don't want to give up on'em though. it's definitely challenging...

not quitting is the best way to teach them not to just quit when shit gets shitty. definitely 1 of life's most important lessons. quitting is easy as hell. the great accomplishments of life don't usually come from quitting.

word to the syllable pronoun...

make like you know what the fuck that means...

PEACE
...be calm...